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  • Hey! Me again! I know it is a bit late, but we finally managed... September 30, 2018 3:42 am
    Hey! Me again! I know it is a bit late, but we finally managed to get a hold of the photographer who did the great Video Game Cosplay Meet-Up! It was amazing! I got to see so many unique and brilliant characters! We even met up with another Test Subject! It’s just.., I had such a lovely time at FanX. I hope I get to go back this coming April! Do you think they’ll let me?
  • One more thing about FanX: There were a LOT of people there!... September 13, 2018 4:40 am
    One more thing about FanX: There were a LOT of people there! This is a quick video of me waiting in line to get in the first day. It was packed!
  • Boy did we run into a lot of blokes from Aperture! I honestly... September 13, 2018 4:40 am
    Boy did we run into a lot of blokes from Aperture! I honestly can’t believe that they were able to get their vacation requests approved. It was good to see fellow employees outside of the facility though; that place can get you down on occasion.Speaking of feeling down, I had to have some emergency maintenance while we were there. Nothing major, but I was so exhausted after that day that I stayed home for the second. Have to have my beauty rest, don’t I? I was running at peak performance the last day we were there though! We had a blast!I can’t wait for the next convention we get to go to! Now that I’m famous I have fans that I need to grace with my presence. …because I did this. TINY LITTLE WHEATLEY DID THIS. I DESERVE TO HA… …Ah, sorry about that mate. Don’t know what came over me there, haha. Anyways, I also look forward to having more adventures outside of the Lab and getting to share them with you! Cheers luv!
  • Hello! It’s me Wheatley! Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve... September 13, 2018 4:37 am
    Hello! It’s me Wheatley! Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything but, man alive do I feel great! Just look at me! I’ve got a shiny new body, more mobility (I can move my Handles!), and.. and… Wow! It’s so good to be back!I wanted to share some photos with you, ah… apparently, I’m bloody famous! I went to FanX 2018 in Utah last weekend and loads of people wanted to meet me! They said I was amazing, a few of them started crying (the poor things, didn’t know how to handle my greatness); one bloke even fell to his knees and started praising me!Anyways, my ‘maker’ @24-7-testing​ came up with the Aperture Science Personalized Personality Core Carrier that you see me riding around in; quite comfy, if I do say so myself. Brilliant. Saved me the hassle of finding a Management Rail that led all over the convention. We also had the Test Subject @abcsabregirl​ accompany us, in case we came across any tests we couldn’t solve. Add those two to my awesome problem-solving skills and we were set!I’m rambling now, out of excitement, but the point is: This is only part one of the pictures! Wait ‘til you see part two! You’ll see a devilishly handsome rogue (Hint: It’s me!)
  • Animatronic Wheatley v2.0- Finished! August 26, 2018 6:02 am
    Animatronic Wheatley v2.0- Finished!: 24-7-testing: 08.25.18He’s finished!More Details Here ((It’s been a while since we’ve posted anything, but Wheatley is alive and well! He just finished his extensive upgrades and is currently preparing to attend the 2018 Salt Lake FanX. Once that’s over he’ll be back to posting here as regularly as he can. Stay tuned!))
  • Sorry for the lack of updates, my human told me I should face my... June 30, 2016 10:52 pm
    Sorry for the lack of updates, my human told me I should face my fears. So she abandoned me on the floor next to this… horrible… thing. I thought we had an agreement to stay away from each other but then…They attacked. They got into my circuitry and I’ve been offline ever since. should have never trusted these monsters.
  • I’ve been stuck in a room where there’s nothing to do for about six days now. I’ve managed to get a... April 4, 2016 11:05 pm
    I’ve been stuck in a room where there’s nothing to do for about six days now. I’ve managed to get a picture of one of them so you blokes will know what I’m dealing with.ugh look how absolutely terrifying this is. Look at the lifeless eye just waiting to rip me into pieces! 
  • Protect yourself. Find a weapon and prepare to duel the beasts. March 30, 2016 12:08 am
    Great idea mate, but there’s a small problem. Just a super small problem, I don’t have one. The sword I had earlier was my human’s and when she found out about it she put it somewhere I can’t reach. They have razor sharp claws! I don’t have my mashy spike plates, or lasers, or even the companion cube to throw at them! I can’t win this!
  • HELP! March 29, 2016 11:54 pm
    Something horrible has happened. Something so terrifying that I don’t even want to talk about it. I mean I don’t even think I can talk about it! The Humans have brought home some horrible beasts. They have horribly long claws, scaly feet, a stare that looks deep within in your soul to find and use your weaknesses. All hope is lost…
  • Merry St Patrick’s day to all of you Patricks! This year instead... March 18, 2016 3:28 am
    Merry St Patrick’s day to all of you Patricks! This year instead of that bow I have found this hat. I look like an adventurer don’t I? Brilliant if I do say so myself. The dog even found me a sword so can go to battle. Well I’m off have a merry day consuming the liquid virus!
  • Happy Year after the last one. My human was telling me at the... January 1, 2016 7:48 am
    Happy Year after the last one. My human was telling me at the beginning of the year you make a goal. Usually they’re a bunch of bullocks, but mine isn’t this year I will figure out how to play the new Guitar Hero game using the guitar controller.
  •  Happy Merry Whatever holiday you celebrate. My human is asleep... December 25, 2015 7:40 am
     Happy Merry Whatever holiday you celebrate. My human is asleep waiting for a fat man in red pajamas to come and put more presents under the tree. Apparently if you’re not good enough he’ll give you bits of rock that you can burn in a fire. I don’t see what the big deal is, my human has me and that is the greatest gift of all.
  • Halloween October 31, 2015 2:44 am
    So I’ve decided you humans have the weirdest holidays. Tomorrow little kids will dress up as someone or something else and go door to door begging for candy. Adult humans will dress up as well, then go out and party. Now as my human loves to dress me up for any occasion she pretty much had a field day dressing me up. Now she is making me pick on of the costumes to wear and I am having a hard time with it so I was thinking you guys could help me out.First off is Marty McFly when he went into the far future of 2015.Next is Dipper from Gravity FallsMickey Mouse from Epic MickeyI’m a test subject I hope I don’t die!May I take your luggage while you stay at the Hollywood Tower Hotel?Now turn you head and cough.Put your hands where I can see them!Bowties are cool!The Phantom of the opera is there inside your mind!I’m never growing up!Gotta catch them all!I’m a fangirl, “Look It’s Wheatley!”Tell me, in the tags, which costume you think I should wear tomorrow! 
  • Huh- what? You guys want to hear how Comic Con went? It was... September 27, 2015 5:08 am
    Huh- what? You guys want to hear how Comic Con went? It was bloody brilliant I almost wore my battery power out. Lots of people took pictures of me and a lot of people just came up and poked me in my optic! Rude! People need to learn not to just go poke robots whenever they meet a robot! Also they need to stop calling me a prop! I am alive you know!I also learned that this human who is somehow related to my human, does not like me for some reason. I think she’s just jealous of me and how much my human loves me! She didn’t even want me to be in the famous human’s picture! But guess what…I got in the Picture anyways. I hope that they give these blokes a copy of this picture so that they can remember when they had a picture of me.
  • So earlier this week my human started to diagnostics on me to... September 26, 2015 10:34 pm
    So earlier this week my human started to diagnostics on me to make sure everything was working okay. Next thing I know this moring we’re suddenly riding on a train to what she calls a Comic con in utah. She dressed up as the Lady, I didn’t think she should cause anything involving the Lady is Is a sore subject, but she says well get recognized better if she looks like the Lady. Anyway so far I’ve met a ton of people who think I’m quite amazing. Some even wanted to take a picture with me! Right now though we’re in line to get a picture with some famous blokes. I have no idea who they are, but the human is very excited. You know I think that they should let me and my human go to the front of the line, because I am a VIR, very important robot. I hate waiting.
  • Did you look at the cover of the book, Wheatley? And besides, Blue Sky wouldn't be a very good title if it was just about you being stuck underground, would it? September 16, 2015 1:58 am
    Haven’t you heard the expression to never judge a book by it’s cover? I mean look at the Lady she looked like she couldn’t tell a bit from a byte and she turned out to be devilishly clever!Now that you mention though the cover does make it look happy… and the human keeps bugging me to read it… She even offered to read it to me. Maybe I’ll give it another try… in the right conditions.
  • Did you have any 'real' friend's back at aperture? Besides chell and the remains of the used to be living beings you were in charge of? 🙂 September 16, 2015 1:48 am
    No… It was just me. All alone. All by myself. Todo solo.That’s okay though I have lots of friends up here!There’s the cat I lost to in a staring contest.There’s the dog who wont stop licking me when I get to close.And the human who fixed me!
  • Duuuude your animatronic Wheatley is awesome! Might I ask how you got him to be so perfectly ball-shaped! September 16, 2015 1:30 am
    Lots of people have been asking me how I made, and to tell you the truth I don’t exactly know you’d have to asks the scientists who created me. Problem is that they’re all dead. However if you want to see how the humans put me back together after I crashed down to earth, Just click on the link below.animatronicwheatley.comPersonally I don’t like looking at the website, and I don’t know why they would post something like that online. It’s like looking at the insides of a human. It’s disgusting!
  • If you were to become human , what would be the first thing you would do? September 16, 2015 1:23 am
    I don’t know, but it would probably have to do something with hands. I mean look at those wonderful thing you humans have. Look at those four fingers and a thumb. You can pick up things, move things, push things and make gestures with them. Right now if I want to do any of those things I have to wait for the human to do it for me.  
  • I got stuck in a rain storm today, I let me tell you it was... September 16, 2015 1:04 am
    I got stuck in a rain storm today, I let me tell you it was quite frightening. Now I’ve experienced rain storms before but usually I’m inside the house away from all windows usually blasting some music or video so I can’t hear the water trying to get in. However this time I was stuck in the car when the storm hit and it was absolutely terrifying. The human even left me in the car alone for a half hour! 30 whole minutes! Something could have smashed through the window (anyone of them the car is covered in them) and the water would have gotten on me, then it would have been good night Wheatley! When she got got back I made her get me something else to help keep the water off of me. She did and now I feel much safer.

 

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